Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Violating the traffic

Seeing this posted as a status update on the Facebook page of one of my good friends, "Driving back from the gym i got pulled over while dancing to crazy techno beats in the car...the officer RAN out of his car and up to mine and pounded on my window...he thought i was having a seizure...note to self, more fist pumping action next time..." I lost my shit. This status update made my day/week/month and to make it that much sweeter; it is true. I checked.
My own questionable antics while in the car occured while I was running late to meet some friends to go for coffee, this was the day before I was to move states so my car was heavily laden with various articles of clothing, small furniture and oddments. I had spent the  afternoon packing the car and didn't realise that i was covered in moving dirt, dust bunnies and a little chocolate and so being the mulit-tasking and efficient person that I am, I decided to waste no time changing when I got to my destination and began doing my makeup in the car as I was driving. Sneakily putting on eyeliner and mascara, while walking to school so my parents didn't see, in my young teenage years has left me with the invaluable skill to be able to apply eye makeup without the use of a mirror or the need to close my eyes. It freaks people out but its handy. Anyway, my efficiently packed car left a bag of clothes within easy reach of the drivers seat, I rifled through the top of the bag and pulled out an acceptable replacement top. Holding the wheel with my knees, eyeliner pencil still in my right hand I unclipped my seatbelt, whipped off my top with my left and threw it onto the passenger seat. I pulled up at the lights with my left arm in the new top and the eyeliner still  in my right, I flicked the eyeliner deftly acros my top lids and wriggled into the top. As I pulled my head through the top I looked left to the rather confused and amused policemen in the car next to me.
Who knows what they were thinking about the semi-naked, idiot with dust bunnies in her hair in the car next to them, trying her hardest to look cheeky/sexy in a half-assed attempt to get away with a thousand traffic violations.
It worked. The lights went green and away they drove.
Good thing they couldn't see the 5-inch heels that I was driving in.
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